Conducting a First Counselling Session

The Reality of the First Session

You have studied the theories. You have written essays. You can recite Freud, Bowlby, and Winnicott. But the first session with a real client is different.

Trainees often freeze. Where do I start? What if I say the wrong thing?

The truth is simple: the first session is not about giving answers. It is about creating structure, safety, and trust. Without that, no real work can begin.

1. The Hidden Foundation: Contracting

Many assume counselling begins with listening. It does not. It begins with contracting.

Contracting is setting the frame:

• Explaining what counselling is, and what it is not.

• Outlining boundaries and expectations.

• Agreeing on confidentiality and its limits.

This is not paperwork alone. It is a living agreement. A strong contract says to the client: This space is safe, structured, and reliable.

2. First Impressions: Presence Without Pressure

When the client arrives, they are scanning you. They are asking themselves: Can I trust you?

Do not shake hands. Do not hug. Neutral, steady presence is enough.

Simple words build safety:

• “Welcome, please take a seat.”

• “Before we begin, I would like to explain how these sessions work.”

3. Informed Consent: Speaking the Unspoken

Clients may never have heard the term before. It is your duty to explain it in plain language.

• Sessions are confidential, except in cases of risk to self or others.

• You will keep notes, and you explain how.

• They may end sessions at any time.

• You are not there to give advice, but to help them explore.

This is not just formality. It is about trust.

4. The First Exchange: Listening Before Asking

Once the frame is set, you may invite the client to speak. A simple: “What brings you here today?” is enough.

Do not rush. Do not bombard with questions. Let silence happen.

Remember:

• Freud: unconscious material does not appear on demand.

• Bowlby: attachment histories shape how clients relate to you.

• Winnicott: the client must feel “held” before they can be themselves.

5. Closing the First Session

Structure matters as much at the end as at the beginning.

Five minutes before closing, you might say:

• “We are coming towards the end of today’s session. How are you feeling as we close?”

This shows reliability. Clients learn that sessions have a steady rhythm.

Why This Matters

Without contracting, there is confusion.
Without clear consent, there is risk.
Without presence, there is no trust.

The first session is not about solving problems. It is about building the frame in which problems can be explored.